Not like in the movies ... at all

We've all watched those romantic movies where the man comes home after a long trip and picks up his wife, hauls her to the bedroom and makes sweet love to her. How many of us have imagined ourselves into one of these situations, where your man has just missed you so much that he forgets everything else once he sees you and just wants to be close to you because he's missed your touch and scent on him.

Not to burst your bubble girls, but real life is seldom like this. Ask any man who's been on a work trip, or a long day of work what the first thing on his mind is  when he opens the door to his house. Chances are it's good shower or a plate of food. The best you are going to get is a long kiss ... and that is mostly in the beginning stages of living together. After you've both found your routines and have been together some of the steaminess simmers down to a light mist, especially after a long workday.

My steamy romantic fantasy happened, but it didn't quite go like in the movies. I used to date a farmer. I was madly infatuated by him. He was a bit older than me, strong, sexy, smart and a hard worker. We didn't live close to each other, so we didn't see  much of one another other than on the weekends and even that didn't happen every week. One day I decided to surprise my guy by showing up to his house unannounced. We hadn't seen each other in almost 3 weeks and I had an "itch". I knew what time he usually got back from work, so I drove over with a pizza (You know I don't cook) to surprise him. Of course I had my romance movie fantasy in my head so I dressed in something sexy and waited for him to come over. When he came home he was pleasantly surprised to see me and we really acted out my fantasy. I can't complain abut his acting skills at all. Since I had to work the next day, I didn't stay over and went back home... very satisfied. Remember when I said that life is not like the movies? All of the above may contradict this statement, but believe me the movies lie. What they don't tell you is that the actors are not sweaty and don't carry dirt and germs of an entire day on their body. That steamy scenes in movies are just an act and that in real life you get a yeast infection from all the dirt and germs if he doesn't shower before you have sex. I had the worst yeast infection of my life and from that day forth, I advise everyone to take a shower before playing out their favorite movie scenes.