Nosy neighbors

Having your own living space has it’s perks. Having your own living space with nosy neighbors is a whole different story.

I happen to have not one but two of those. The lady living in the house on the left always knows everyone’s business and has assigned herself the task to tell everyone everything. I never give her much to talk about since I’m barely home. I work in the morning, go to school at night and do many things in between. When I am at home, I’m mostly inside doing some, well overdue, housework or work on an article or project. I rarely have guests over so the few times someone comes over she and my other neighbor, an older annoying type, who loves to be a part of everything and thinks he’s funny, finally have a chance to lurk around and do what they do best … be nosy.
I had to finish a few papers for school somewhere in July, so I took a few vacation days from work, to be able to work on reaching my deadlines. I was elbows deep in some research when my phone rang. It was a friend of mine who was in the neighborhood, drove past my house and saw my door open. “Hon Anthony here, I see your at home, can I please use your bathroom, I really need to number 2 (he used more interesting language) and I won’t make it to my house.” This friend happens to be a police officer who was on duty. I let him in, but told him to take off his uniform. I mean, you can’t take that smell back to the station right? After he took care of business, he took a shower. By that time, my neighborhood watch had noticed the police car in front of my house. Neighbor number one suddenly had to let out her dog and neighbor number 2 had to go talk to her… both right in front of my gate.  I started to mutter in annoyance, because I know I was going to be the subject of the weekly gossip. Anthony asked what was up, so I told him that his presence stirred up some dust that had been lying on the subject whether I was seeing anyone or not. Anthony then did something I would never have dared in any lifetime. He stepped out of the bathroom, wrapped his towel around his waist and went to stand in my front door. And right when my two neighbors turned to look at him … he dropped his towel and gave them a front view they will remember even if they turn senile. The good thing about all this? We had a good laugh and they never came to the gate ever again when they saw I had company.